Further to the post below, it's worth pointing out that TOMTIT has been conducting experimental psychical research for some nine years now, at enormous cost and with inconclusive results.
On the plus side, people have stopped dying, and this has led to enormous reductions in our waste disposal bill. On the negative side, there are still far too many nose-bleeds, ear-bleeds and eye-bleeds happening, and poor Fearlono has been in two irreversible comas.
This kid doesn't look too happy, granted, but then he's a selfish little twerp. The discomfort he is going through on a daily basis isn't for his benefit, it's for all mankind. Do e-mail us if you'd like to sponsor him. Does six quid a month sound reasonable?
Our Bible is John L. Randall’s 'Parapsychology and The Nature
of Life'. We’ve never read it, but the cover is great and it is subtitled ‘A
Scientific Appraisal’ ,so it’s bound to be spot on. Sure, there could have been
an infinite number of heads in the illustration but that’s hardly John L.
Randall’s fault, unless he did the illustration in which case it is.
The chapter titles are brilliant: The Descent of Man; Life In The Test Tube; The Existential Vacuum; Psi In The Space Age; Mechanism In The Melting Pot and many, many, many others.
Top secret work in our soundproof science dungeon continues, and we will not give up until we find irrefutable and incontrovertible proof of our theory that everyone is sort of psychic. But then you probably already knew that.
We feel we’re on the verge of a breakthrough. We have done
for ages.
I'm finding it really awkward to keep that boy's hair trimmed without cutting through some wires or slicing bits of plastic shit in half.
ReplyDeleteDrifting in and out of comas doesn't help either.
How long is this going to take ?